Updated: Jun 24
Any negative emotion doesn’t only affect the longevity of your life, but more importantly the quality.
You may be thinking that life is presenting you with many responsibilities that you care about and you want to do your best to keep things moving in the right direction.
Yes! It is important to do your part. Now the question is, are you realistic in viewing your part?
Sometimes you may feel that if you don’t do something or actively engage in a situation, it might not end up well. Then you realize that you can simply influence people and situations, never control them. To truly influence, you need your confidence and peacefulness, rather than your worry and anxiety.
Although you know this already, it may still be difficult to feel relaxed, and that’s completely normal if you have the habit of feeling anxious. You may think that some things trigger your anxiety. But what is actually happening is that because you have the habit of anxiety, you are on the look out for something to justify your feeling of anxiety. The truth is, having such a life-diminishing habit, you will always manage to find something to worry about in the safest most ideal of conditions.
How could you help yourself step OUT of Anxiety?
Follow these 2 DON’Ts & 3 DOs:
1. DON'T believe your mind
The source of your thoughts could be a specific programming in the dark room of your subconscious mind, that you are completely unaware of and you have never chosen. And that’s ok, just don’t believe it as the truth. Assume the observer role of your thoughts. Be selective in what thoughts you give power to with your attention and action. If a negative thought or argument passes through your mind, observe it without believing or reacting to it. Let it pass. With as little time as 3 weeks, those draining thoughts will become less and less.
2. DON'T take yourself too seriously
Avoid going around telling your friends and relatives your stories, only for them to validate what you’re doing and how you’re feeling. They’re well meaning of course, but they're not helping. So help yourself by either finding a topic that generates better feelings, or by laughing at yourself (that’s a life skill that can be a game changer).
Easy? It takes practice.
Remember, this is not about being irresponsible. This is about relaxing your mind so that you’re better able to deal with any challenge.
3. DO give your mind a break
10-20 minutes daily would do the trick. Simply allow it to stay in silence, enjoy the nothingness, the empty space in your mind. You could for example bring a plant or a pebble and soft gaze on it for few minutes, avoid labeling what you see, so instead of thinking “plant”, see the colors and the lines.
This ability to relax your mind in waking hours at will, allows you to effectively manage your anxiety. Because you are then the one running your mind, and not vice versa.
4. DO listen to brainwaves that calm anxiety and stress
They are available on YouTube for free, you can also get them on apps, here are a couple of suggestions:
5. DO seek help
Don’t wait till you’re in crisis. When you share your thoughts with a professional, you will be able to see that those thoughts were only big in your head. Once you put them out there and examine them from a distance, you start to see them differently.
If you have a strong desire to improve the quality of your life, and are ready to couple that with discipline, there's no habit or subconscious program that can stop you from designing your life the way you choose.